Rough Justice, S2.11

Di Barker pulls up to Fenner’s house. His car's in the shop so she's giving him a lift.  He seems out of sorts, but who cares??

G-Wing. In the dorm, Crystal rinses her hairbrush in the sink.

Renee: "Christ’s sake, I gotta use that sink too, ya know!”
Crystal: "What's your problem, girl?"
Renee: "It's filthy, that's what. And get those bloody jungle beads off there!"
Crystal: "You better watch your mouth!"

Shaz and Denny exchange an uneasy glance.

"Yeah?" Renee gets off the bed and walks towards her. "Or what?"

Denny (pleading): "Crystal? Leave it."
Crystal: "I ain't afraid of this scumbag."

So 'this scumbag' grabs Crystal by her throat and shoves her against the wall. Just as Di opens for unlock and asks if everything's ok.
Renee: "Couldn't be better ey, girls?"


Bathroom. Yvonne comes out of a stall to find Nikki at the sink. "Alright, Yvonne."

Renee's in one of the stalls and overhears. Pulling her trusty blade from her mouth pocket, she sneaks up on Yvonne.

...who turns around as Renee tries to slash her. Yvonne blocks her arm and Nikki jumps in, pulling Renee off. The razor slides across the floor.


"That's just for starters."

She leaves. Without her trusty razor.

Nikki (with a penchant for the obvious): "you're gonna hafta watch her." Yvonne brushes it off with, "I can look after meself."

I know you're shook up, Yvonne, but a simple 'thanks, Nikki' would be appropriate. I mean, seriously - incarceration is no excuse for poor manners.

(And I hate to get all picky but.... Nikki picks up the razor - what becomes of it? Does she give it to Yvonne to melt between the bristles of her toothbrush? No she doesn't, but she sure as hell should).

And finally, the return of Helen Stewart! Looking lovely, as always. Dominick thinks so as well.

Ok, that's enough, Dom - I insist you step away from Helen. No, really. I mean it!

And just as he does, Di Barker shows up, with that crazy ass grin of hers. Which looks crazier than usual. "You should be working, not eyein' up women."

Some of us can work and eye up women at the same time, Di. I like to call it 'multitasking.'

Chow time. Renee's back on the meal line, Shell's back behind the servery, and here we go again with the food.

Renee: "What's in that?"
Shell: "It's shepherd's pie."
Renee: "I asked what was in it."

Shell (rolls her eyes): "Potatoes and dead cow, 'appy? And a nice ice cream to follow."
Renee (nods at the ice cream): "Gimme two."
Shell: "Strictly one each, I'm afraid."
Renee: "I said, 'I'll have two'."
Shell (to fat chick): "You're starting your diet today, ain't ya, Felicity?"

Hee.

As Renee reaches for the ice cream, Shell stops her. "Don't ya wanna know what's in 'em? Ya usually do. (reads off ingredients) 'Reconstituted skim milk, sugar, chocolate flavoring, cream, glucose...chopped mixed nuts, salt, flavorings'..."

Renee tells her to "stick it" and walks away.

...all of which was closely clocked by Yvonne.

Hmmm....what is the mobster's moll mulling?

Out in the yard. Nikki's busy...potting when Helen walks by (staring pointedly at ye olde potting shed as she does). Nikki hears her psychic call and comes a-running.

Nikki: "Helen! When did you come in?"
Helen: "This morning. I've been in meetings all day."

Nikki: "You here for long?"
Helen: "Uh huh. I'm setting up a lifer's group. We are going to be seeing a lot more of each other."
Nikki (smiling): "In private, I hope."
Helen: "You're gonna have to keep your hormones under control, Nikki!"

Oh, that's no fun! Besides, Helen - your hormones seem pretty...happy at the moment. I know mine are doing pirouettes.

Helen: "Listen, I've got some good news."
Nikki: "Yeah?"
Helen: "I sent a copy of your file to a lawyer friend of mine, she wants to meet you."
Nikki: "She knows about my case?"
Helen: "She thinks that you could appeal your sentence."
Nikki: "I can't believe it, you're joking. Wait 'til Fenner hears."
Helen: "Oh don't wind him up. I kind of broke the rules when I photocopied your file. Listen, we've got a long way to go, so don't get your hopes too high."
Nikki: Yeah, but just to even have a hope..."
Helen: "I've got to go, got more meetings. I'll see you tomorrow."

On the wing, Renee walk by and blows Shell a kiss (the "I'd like to kill you" kind of kiss - not the "I'd like to fuck you" kind).

Shell: "I don't envy you, sharing a cell with 'er. On and on about her friggin' food! 'What's in this? What's in that?' Only wish she'd choke on it."

Back in the dorm, Renee can't resist another snipe at Crystal, and tells her to "piss off back to the jungle."

Which sends Crystal pissing off to Karen and Fenner. I think it's funny that she reports Renee for a racist comment and NOT for trying to choke her earlier but hey, I always said she was a strange one, that Crystal.

Fenner tells Karen he'll take care of Renee; she says to "throw the bloody book at her."

In the dorm, Fenner confronts her about her comments, but she says, "it's a free country, mister. I'll think what I bloody well want!"

Fenner: "As long as you keep your thoughts to yourself. But if you open that again," shoves his finger in her face, "I'll have you. And I mean it, believe me."

Renee: "You don't scare me."

Fenner's response is pretty smart. He doesn't threaten her or do his trademark "smash-face-into-wall/floor," ala Shell. No, he goes straight for Renee's toiletries - prized commodities in prison - and proceeds to pour her shampoo down the john.

Renee (yells): "It's just hair stuff!"
Fenner: "So you say."

She throws herself at Fenner, who just shoves her away. "Sit down!" he yells. "And watch!" As he empties out her shampoo bottle. Then he pours out her conditioner.  Until,

Renee: "Okay, I heard ya."
Fenner: "Always nice to see one of the girls turn over a new leaf."

Then he tells her, "our loo cleaner got shipped out this morning. You got the job. Don't worry, you'll get used to the smell."

Sweet! I can't believe I'm actually cheering Fenner but yes, I am.

The Library. Yvonne's perusing a thick tome in the "Health & Medicine" section.

Maybe she's considering a pre-med program at Larkhall?

It's lockup time, so Yvonne tears a page from the book and stuffs it down her pants. (Ok, that right there? Defacing a book? That's just criminal).

In the dorm, Shaz baits old Bodybag. When Sylvia comes in the cell, Shaz and Denny promptly step outside and close the door behind them.

Sylvia peers thru the tray slot and warns them they're gonna get in trouble.

Shaz: "If we get in trouble, so are you. Cuz it's against the rules to come into a cell and leave the door unguarded, innit?"
Sylvia: "Now come on, girls, the joke's over. Let me out. Now."

But they can't, since they don't have the keys.

Sylvia: "Now listen carefully. You've had your laugh. This is your last chance. I'm gonna hand you out my keys, and you're gonna unlock this door. And we'll say no more about it, as long as you do what I say."

Buh-bye, Syl! Shaz grabs the keys. And slams the tray slot in Sylv's face.  Hee.  Shaz and Denny, out for another night on the town!

Inside, Crystal and Renee rip on old Bodybag.

Renee: "I knew screws were thick, but you take the bleedin' biscuit."

Servery, Shaz takes some moldy bread from the garbage and wraps it in a cloth. Denny stuffs her pockets full of snacks. But when they think they see a rat behind a big box of rat poison, they run out.

Dorm, Sylvia holds her walkie-talkie, as if she's thinking of calling for help. Which, of course, would get her in trouble. And then, there's a plaintive stage whisper outside the door. 
Shaz: "Miss Hollamby?"
Sylvia (jumps up): "Open this door immediately!"
Shaz: "Me and Denny wanna get back in our room."
Sylvia: "Well, open the flamin' door!"
Shaz: "We're scared you'll get us into trouble, miss."
Sylvia: "You will get into trouble if you don't open this door now!"

Shaz opens the door, Den gives Sylvia the keys and she storms out, locking the cell behind her.

Later, while everyone else sleeps, Shaz takes the moldy bread and puts it in Renee's box of juice.

Next morning. The first of the lifer's meetings, which includes Shaz, Shell, and Nikki.

Helen: "So, my name's Helen Stewart for those that don't know me. And I suppose I'd better start by letting you know what I'm doing here. Basically, it's gonna be my job to represent you as a special group within the prison service..."

Shaz, of course, is excited. Shell, of course, is bored.

And Nikki, of course, is.....

Helen: "...you all need to maximize your chances of early release, so we're gonna look at your offending behavior...."

She looks right at Nikki when she says "offending behavior." And immediately gets all flustered. She looks away while Nikki looks down and smiles.

It's like they're playing footsies with their eyes and it's absolutely delicious...

Servery. Crystal's bringing stuff in when her eyes fall on the box of rat poison in the corner (cue suspenseful music).

Back in the lifer's group, Helen passes out questionnaires for them to fill out. And...the bell rings. Meeting over. As the other women leave, Nikki hangs back for some quality time.

Nikki: "I'm gonna phone my lawyer now, about my appeal."

Helen: "Are you still in touch with Trisha?"
Nikki: "Why?"
Helen: "Because you're gonna need friends on the outside if this goes ahead. Publicity, lobbying, that kind of thing."
Nikki: "She still runs our club, so we keep in touch."
Helen: "Good."
Nikki: "Hard to believe I'm a businesswoman, innit?"
Helen: "Sometimes."

Nikki: "We're doing well, apparently. (pause) I'm gonna show you a good time when I get out."
Helen: "I hope so."

And just as they're about to kiss...



Aggghh!! Damn you, Dominick, damn you to hell!

Dominick explains he just wanted to lock up, but Nikki's all, 'grrrr...ya cock blocking bastard...' and gives him a dirty look on the way out.

Screw's Lounge. Jim invites Dom for a drink. Like now. In the middle of the workday. In the Officer's Club. Where they can drink on-duty!

Dorm, Renee tosses a banana at Crystal, laughs, and takes a looong swig from her juice carton. Which she quickly spews out. And goes running to the loo to hurl.

And in the officer's mess hall, Jim's tossing brews back.

Cut to...

...someone smashing up peanuts and filling a pepper shaker.

Lunchroom. Renee sits down to eat.  Sprinkles some salt, some pepper, and starts shoveling food in her mouth. Literally.

Di Barker sits down and tries to persuade Renee to make friends, "do you not think you're gonna need some support?"
Renee (shakes her head): "Naw."

And never once breaks stride with that fork - she is seriously chowing down, yo...

...with all of G-Wing's hatin' on her ass:




Suddenly, Renee stops chewing.



And goes running...but it's too late.

She collapses, seizes, and dies. Sprawled across the ‘G’ on the floor.

Bang up time!

On G-3. Shell calls out to Yvonne in the next cell.

Shell: "Dump a little arsenic in her tea, did ya?"
Yvonne: "I wish!"
Shell: "There's gonna be an investigation."
Yvonne: "Don't bother me, Shell. You're the one that serves the food, remember? In fact, didn't you say you'd like her to 'choke on it?'"

Shell: "Oh fuck" "Yeah, well that was just a sayin', wasn't it?"
Yvonne: "Well you try tellin' the police that. I'm sure they'll believe ya!"

Screw's Lounge. Karen says they're waiting on the autopsy, but Renee was poisoned and there's an investigation underway. Jim stumbles in late. And hungover. And seriously unshaven. He says it was a late night out with the wife.

Karen: "Anyway, I've set the police up in the probation office. Lunch and dinner will be served in cell. And there will be no association."

Shaz is the police's top suspect, given her history of poisoning. Karen's doubtful, since Shaz didn't have access to the servery.  But there's the rat poison that's been laid out....

Karen: "Obviously, they'll want to interview all of us, too. Make sure we're who we say we are."

Which makes Di laugh just a little too loud.

After the meeting, Jim thanks Karen for not giving him a hard time.

In the dorm, Shaz amuses Denny and Crystal with a reenactment of Renee's death, complete with retching and rolling on the floor.

Crystal: "She didn't deserve to live. She stole my hair oil."

Ha! Best. Crystal. Line. EVER.

Di comes in for Shaz. The police want to speak to her.

And in case we've failed to fully appreciate the Fenner storyline:

Jim's inside drinking when Sylvia comes looking for him. She tells him she gave "that Shaz creature" her keys the other night, and it's possible she got into the servery.

Jim: "Admit it, Sylvia. You've been a stupid bitch. Do yourself a favor and tell Betts before some con does."

Wow, drunk Fenner gives better advice than sober Fenner!  And with that, he orders another drink.

Back inside, the detectives interrogate Shaz, who denies any involvement in Renee's death.

G-Wing. Helen walks to Nikki's cell, peers thru the peephole, and lets herself in. Where Nikki's fast asleep.

Helen sits on the edge of the bed, then reaches out and strokes her face.

Nikki wakes up (well, fairly jumps out of her skin).

Helen: "Sorry."
Nikki: "Oh, christ!"
Helen: "You're on your own?"
Nikki: "The screws let Barbara out cuz she makes their tea."
Helen: "I've come to collect the questionnaire. Did you fill it in?"
Nikki: "Yeah (hands it to Helen). My board review's in two month's time. My appeal might be underway by then."
Helen: "If it's granted."

Nikki hands Helen a piece of paper.

Helen: "What's this?"
Nikki: "I'm not usually the soppy type, but it says a lot of the things I don't get a chance to say in this place."


Helen: "I'll wait 'til I'm in bed - I'll read it then."

(and damn Shed for not showing Helen in bed reading the letter)!

Just then, Karen comes in and both Helen and Nikki jump up. Which doesn't look at all suspicious.

Helen: "Bye, Nikki, I'll look forward to reading your views."
Nikki: "Yeah, I mean every word."



Probation Office. Now Crystal's being questioned by the police, due to all the racist comments Renee made. But Crystal points out, "every girl on G-Wing had a motive."

Hallway. Sylvia tells Karen she was outsmarted by Shaz and Denny, gave them her keys, and basically, let them go the servery.

Karen’s beyond pissed off and tells Sylvia to schedule a formal appointment with her office.

Probation Office. Now Shell's being interrogated. When the cops say she was heard wishing Renee would "choke" on her food, Shell says Shaz poisoned her. When they say it couldn't be Shaz, Shell says Renee was shagging Yvonne's man.

Oh Shell - you gravely disappoint me once again...

The police are very interested to hear about Charlie and Renee. But just then, Karen comes in. She pulls the detective aside and explains Shaz did get into the servery.

I love the 'whodunit' aspect of this episode. Was it Shell in the servery with a spoon? Shaz in the shed with moldy bread? Crystal in the kitchen with a crucifix?

The dorm. Karen comes to get Shaz - she knows about their "little expedition to the servery." Karen warns Denny that she's not off the hook either.

Nighttime. Helen runs into Dominick as she's leaving. They joke a bit, and he tells her he's missed her.

Dominick: "We should have a catch-up drink.
Helen: "Yeah, I wanna pick your brains about Shell Dockley."
Dominick: "What about tomorrow night? We could have a curry or something."

Helen thinks it's a good idea, and says good night. But someone's been watching from her cell.

Jim staggers out of the Officer's Club and right into Dom. And asks him back inside for a drink. Dom declines, however.

Fenner: "Tomorrow night?"
Dominick: "Made arrangements. Sorry."
Fenner (smiles): "Eh, hot date, is it?"
Dominick: "Something like that."

Actually, Dom, I'm going with "nothing like that."

Probation Office. Shaz confesses about the moldy bread in Renee's juice, but they think she used rat poison.

Shaz: "No way! Am I gonna get charged with another murder?"

Karen's Office. She meets with Sylvia and tells her she'll be docked a month's pay, demoted to basic grade, and stripped of her pips.

I like that the pips are velcroed to her shoulders and she just tears them off. In fact, I like the whole idea of velcro clothing - especially for Helen and Nikki.

Nikki meets with Clair, Helen's lawyer friend. Nikki thanks her for taking her case.

Claire: "Well, you're the only woman in Britain serving life for murdering a police officer. It's very high profile."

Claire's found info that Nikki's lawyers were denied access to: a year before DC Gossard attacked Trish, his wife left him, citing "physical and mental cruelty."

Claire: "Seems Detective Gossard was a man with a violent history. Did you know that?"
Nikki: "No."

Karen's Office. Detective Douchebag and his sycophantic sidekick want access to G-Wing's records. They also want to interview Bodybag. And Fenner, who was in charge at the time of Renee's fortunate demise.

After the detectives leave, Dom tells Karen that Jim actually wasn't around when Renee kicked it. She tells him to find Jim, NOW.

G-Wing. Yvonne comes downstairs with a big ol' smile.

Di: “Yeah, well, there’s no need to smile about it, Mrs. Atkins.”
Yvonne: “Hey, my bleedin pillow’s wet for all the tears I been cryin’.”

Hee, I love you, Yvonne!

Di says that Shaz confessed to poisoning Renee, which surprises Yvonne. She watches Shaz and Denny walk onto the wing, arms around each other.

I love Shaz and Denny's PDAs - they're always hangin' on each other and hugging.

Denny: "Should've left that bitch to me. I was gonna smother her with a pillow."
Shaz: "But then you'd be doing life. I'm already doing life, they can't give me anymore."

But Denny doesn't want to leave Larkhall without Shaz.

Yvonne steps over. "Whaddya think you're playing at? Confessing to the murder of Renee Williams?"
Shaz: "I done it, Yvonne."
Yvonne: "No, you didn't."

Yvonne pulls Denny to the side, "she didn't murder Renee Williams." Denny insists Renee got what she deserved.

Yvonne (points at Shaz): "You're gonna feel like shit if that little girl of yours goes down for a murder."
Denny: "It really don't matter, Yvonne. They'll just put her back in here."
Yvonne (upset): "Denny, poisoning people - it's mad stuff. She's gonna end up in a hospital for the criminally insane."
Denny: "No, they can't do that."
Yvonne: "Can't they?"

Yvonne tells her she better make up an alibi, and fast.

Officers Mess Hall. Yep, Fenner's still drinking. Dom comes in - he says he had to tell Karen that Jim wasn't around when Renee died. Oh, and Karen wants to see him. Right now.

Fenner: "Sod it. I'm going home."

Visitor's Room.

Claire: "Your statement to the police didn't help you much. Kind of gives the impression you couldn't care less."
Nikki: "When I saw him lying there, I was totally shocked. The police wouldn't believe me or Trisha that the guy was trying to rape her! No matter what we said. They questioned me for hours. I just lost it."

Claire asks if Trish will testify for her. Nikki says she will.

Helen walks in. "Hi. So how'd it go?" Claire says they've just finished. She and Helen kiss each other good-bye.

Helen: "Well, you look pleased enough."
Nikki: "I am. The guy I killed, turns out he had a record of violence. First I heard of it. She's really good, your friend."
Helen: "Yeah?"
Nikki: "You known her for long?"
Helen: "Yonks."
Nikki: "That all she is - a friend?"

Helen: "Nikki, I've told you before - I've never been into women."
Nikki: "Just men."
Helen: "Oh, stop being jealous. Look, that letter you wrote me - I feel exactly the same. Trust me."

Well, I'd like to trust you on this, Helen, but it would've helped if we'd actually seen you read the letter. I'm just saying. But I'm right there with ya on the jealousy thing. It's very unattractive in a woman.

Probation Office. Denny tells the detectives that Shaz didn't kill Renee. But DC Douchebag isn't hearing it - Shaz confessed and that's good enough for him.

Denny: "She never did it, ya dickhead!"

Which, strangely enough, fails to convince them.

Denny: "I can prove she didn't do it. She just said it to protect me. Cuz it was me that put the stuff into Renee's drink."

Just then his phone rings. It's one of those "...what? Are you sure, for christ's sake?" kind of calls. He hangs up.

To Denny: "You. Beat it."

Karen's Office. DC Douchebag comes in. Karen's reading the report of Renee's death.

Karen: "Anaphylactic shock?"
Douchebag: "Apparently it's..."
Karen (cuts him off): "Yes, I know what it is. I'm a trained nurse."

(bwahahahaa!!  Really, Karen?? You don't say!)

Karen: "So, what's she allergic to?"
Douchebag: "Nuts."

Karen checks Renee's file, where there's no mention of her allergy. She says Shaz is obviously innocent. Ok, then - bye, Detective! Have a nice Summer's Eve!

In the hallway, Karen runs into Dom. She wants to know if he found Jim. Yes, he found Fenner, and Fenner went home.

Karen: "What do you mean he's gone home? What, he's just walked off the job?!"
Dom (shrugs): "I don't know what got into him."

Extreme dereliction of duty, I'd say. From the extreme derelict himself.

Karen walks to G-Wing and asks for everyone's attention. "I just wanted to let you know the police have found the cause of Renee Williams' death. (long pause while everyone squirms). "A severe allergic reaction to nuts."



Denny: "Miss? Does that mean she weren't murdered?"
Karen: "Yes."

Shaz and Denny hug. Again, adorable.

Karen: "But it doesn't mean you two are off the hook. No way."

She walks over to Di and tells her, "I want Daniella Blood and Sharon Wiley put in seg tonite..no, now, in fact. And as far apart as possible."

Di (laughs): "Oh, that's not going to go down well!"
Karen: "Good."

Di asks for Dom's help in separating the lovebirds.

Dominick (checks his watch): "Shit. I gotta meet Helen Stewart in 15 minutes."
Di (sputters): "That'll be nice.
Dominick: "Well, it's just a drink and a curry."
Di: "'Just.' Sounds like a lethal combination. (pause) Hope it goes well."
Dominick: "Yeah, me too."

They go off to get Shaz and Denny. Having overheard, Nikki steps out from behind the stairs.

Nighttime. Yvonne's on her bed eating peanuts. She tosses one up, catches it in her mouth, and smiles.

And looks over at Charlie's picture.

...and the epi's over as far as I'm concerned. There's some god awful scene where Karen goes to Jim's house, finds out Marilyn left him, and comforts him. But I've chosen to ignore that bit of mad stuff. I'm simply pretending it never happened.